raramomtoo3

Happy New Year’s Eve to all of my loyal readers.  I hope your last day of 2008 is going better than mine is.  I went to the orthopedic doctor this morning.  He told me that the place where I broke my foot is the worst place to break it.  If it had been a little up or a little down we wouldn’t have a problem but of course I had to break it bad.  They put on a real cast this morning.  My leg now looks like a train cart that got caught downtown for the graffiti artist to do their thing.  I also am now a proud owner of a metallic red walker with four wheels.  This is my new wheels.  Not only is it awesome it has a neat chair thing so I can sit down if I need too.  I am on a STRICT no weight on leg policy.  If I put weight on my foot I can break it even worse.  I am doing my best to not break it worse.  I do not want to have surgery again.  One a year is enough.  Of course it wouldn’t be the same years now will it?  I also got this cast cover thing so I can take a shower.  THANK YOU GOD for whoever invented this miracle.  So tomorrow I will be taking a shower and I am sure you all will appreciate that as much as I do.  So it is New Year’s Eve and I am lying in the bed with my foot up and I assume I will be doing for awhile.  So I will stop belly aching on this subject.  I wanted to spend a few minutes to recapping my year.  So here are the top five worst events of 2008.  1. I was sick and in the hospital in March.  2.  My husband lost his grandmother in Match.  3.  I was turned down for my disability. 4. In December I was in the hospital and ended up with having surgery.  5.  Of course breaking my freaking foot will round out this year for me.  So take a few minutes go think back on your worst events this year.  My best five things that happened to me this year.  1.  I wrote a book and I hope to publish it.  2. My daughter got to go to Space Camp. 3. We celebrated my brother’s 21^st birthday here on earth. 4. My kids were mostly healthy.  5. We made it through 2008.  What were the best things that happened to you and your family?  Well I will l take mercy on you today and let you off the hook.  Please promise me that you will be safe and NO drinking and driving tonight.  So I will talk with you next year my dear friends.  May the “new year” angels smile down on all of us….

Good afternoon to my dear friends and family.  I hope your Tuesday is going well and you are happy.  I am stuck in bed.  Now in theory this should be AWESOME.  Just me, my bed and my TV and all is right with the world.  However I do not function like this.  I need to work so badly.  If I can’t work then I don’t make money and without money my family will be homeless.  So I am trying my best to figure out a way to go back to work.  I feel like crap and I feel stupid.  I have let my friends at work down.  I have let my family down.  I am still trying to figure out what the crap happened.  All I did was reach up on my tip toes and SNAP.  I am the only fool in the world who managed to break her foot while washing a window.  Ok now if I was cleaning skyscraper windows I can understand but this was on my eye level.  So you should see my routines.  It is a circus act just to go to the bathroom.  I basically throw myself on the bed and roll over to my side of the bed.  Then it takes a crane to get me off the bed onto the crutches.  Then I am lifting three hundred pounds on one foot and two sticks.  So I hop my way to the bathroom.  My husband has to go with me so I can be lifted off the stupid toilet.  By the time I am done I am breathing like I have run a marathon.  By the time this ordeal is over my left leg will look like the Incredible Hulk and my right leg will be like a wet noodle.  Tomorrow morning we go to the orthopedic doctor.  I am praying it is just broken and a cast will be enough.  I don’t want to go through another surgery.  I had this done on my hand and don’t look forward to having it done on my foot.  So here I am.  Now if only I could get paid for watching TV.  You guys are lucky.  I could be forced to drag on and on in these posts and make you suffer but that seems a bit cruel even for me.  So I will keep them short even though I am bored out of my freaking head.  So what are you planning for your New Year’s Eve?  As of now I plan to try and only make one bathroom visit.  The rest will just suck.  I wanted to go to a party but like I said I can barely make it to the bathroom much less out to my car and into their house but we will see.  Like I said it all depends on the doctor visit.  Well now I am thinking maybe surgery would be better.  Because as of right now my foot is hurting like hell but maybe it they put pins in it that will make it heal.  Even if they could put a walking cast on it or something.  Oh well we will just pray and hope it works out for the best.  So on that note I am about to watch set you free for today and watch a movie with my wee ones.  So may the “better TV” angels smile on us all……

I sure hope your Monday is going better than mine.  You will never guess what happened to me today.  I broke my freaking foot.  Yes you read this right I have broken my foot.  At work this morning I was cleaning my windows in the breakfast room.  I had put fake snow around the edges so when I went to do my weekly window wash I decided to take it off.  I was a tad bit short from reaching the top so I reached up and stood on my tippy toes.  As soon as I stood up I heard the worst sound I had ever heard in my life at the same time I felt the worst pain I had ever felt.  Within that second it took I almost passed out.  I happened to lean forward and caught myself with my arms against the window.  If I had gone back I would have hit my head on the sidewalk.  As I stood there I had a guest stop to ask me a question.  After I answered his question I asked if he was going inside.  He said no but he would if I needed him too.  I knew I wasn’t going to make it inside.  He helped me to sit down on a bench and went inside for help.  I knew right then I was screwed.  He came back with help.  I tried to go inside but couldn’t make it.  My dear friend Carrie remembered the rolling computer desk chair in the lobby and got for to ride in.  The man went inside and got a blanket and towel for my foot.  Now you have to know for those of you who don’t know I am a big girl.  If you take a fat girl with a broken foot and try to help her walk it isn’t a pretty picture.  My manager called my husband and another circus act took place to get me into the van.  I went straight to the ER I did not pass go and did not collect $200.  Now for me to go the ER you have to know I am in bad shape.  I cannot stand going there.  It is usually four hours of my life I will never get back.  So we go in and off we go.  When the doctor first looked he said it might be a popped tendon.  Now I am not a doctor so I wasn’t sure what was worse a tendon or broken bone.  So the first step was an Ex-Ray.  Few minutes later the doctor pops in and announces that I have at least one broken bone but looks like I might have more.  Then we moved on to the CT-Scan.  I am still not clear on what the results were from that.  The doctor came back in and said “I have no idea how you did ALL OF THAT by standing on your tippy toes.” My thought was “I must just be good at it”.  So they put on a splint and I am now a proud owner of pair of crutches.  Now let’s think this over my dear readers.  I am a big girl and I have gone from putting all that weight on two feet to one.  The nurse told me how to do it.  Ok in “theory” this is a good idea but in “practice” it just DOES NOT work.  I can barely walk on my two feet so you can imagine how bad it is to try it with one foot and two sticks.  If one more person tries to tell me “how” to walk on those God forsaken things I am going to turn somebody into a Popsicle. (For those not in the south that means I am shoving the crutch up their rear ends)  I am bed bound with my foot up and on restrictions of “no weight bearing”.  I am three hundred pounds people there is NO SUCH THING as “no weight bearing”.  Anyway I had to make an appointment with an orthopedic doctor.  The ER doctor said it might require pins being put in.  Now I had that done when I was fourteen and I had an ATV accident and let me tell you this it SUCKED.  So I go Wednesday in the morning to see him.  So please pray it will be ok without surgery.  The worst part is I had so many plans for New Year’s Eve.  So I can’t have a good time, drink, or raise cane.  However if you read my blogs you know I have the obsession with taking showers.  I couldn’t shower easily with the hole in my back but now it is impossible.  So I am stuck in my bed with a house full of screaming family members.  The house is destroyed and the kids refuse to clean it.  I am in so much pain and I am so tired and I am so depressed.  Why can’t they just help out without acting this way?  Dear readers what am I going to do?  I have no money and I don’t know when I will be able to work.  I can’t get any help with the house work.  My husband won’t clean the house because he thinks it is all the kids business.  Now I agree they are the reason the house is dirty since we often stay in our room so they can watch what they want in the living room.  They still need help and I can no longer help.  Well I need to go before I start to cry.  Why is God so mad at me?  Who did I piss off in my former life?  Till tomorrow dear readers I hope you and your bones stay intact and the “broken bone angels” only smile down on me today….

Hey there my dear readers I hope your Sunday is going well.  I hope you are resting as God intended.  Of course I guess God intended me to work.  He also intended for me to have three children determined to kill each other and a husband that thinks yelling at the top of his lung is REALLY going to help get the kids to do their chores.  I don’t know why no one in this house can do ANYTHING without yelling.  SEE EVERYONE IN THIS HOUSE YELLS FOR NO GOOD REASON! Ok I am sorry I had to get that out of my system.  Now see when I pulled out the old laptop I thought I didn’t have anything to bore you with today and I was WRONG.  As I have mentioned a dear angel provided my family a stove for Christmas.  Due to the chaos of Christmas and that crap we haven’t had a chance to use the new one.  Yes I know how sorry a mom I am to have not used a stove for over a week but everything we have had is microwavable friendly.  So of course you know how it is when you move something in your house that you haven’t moved since you moved into the place?  You find those missing items you thought the “goblin” had stolen.  Then there are food particles you find that you haven’t cooked in two years.  Well that is what the kids are cleaning up now and they are complaining like no tomorrow.  They just assume that a cleaning fairy pops in and cleans things up while they slumber but they now that I am not a fairy and that they are going to help out.  Now don’t get me wrong I didn’t have children just to have remote controls, dishwasher, dog walkers, or little maids.  However I didn’t sign a contract stating that when I got married that I ALONE would be the cook, housekeeper, laundry person, or well YOU KNOW.  So until I start getting help this mom and wife is going on strike.  Of course they can hold out longer than I can.  If I see dishes I get “drawn” to them and I must wash them.  If I find dirty clothes I wash them.  It just doesn’t seem fair that not only do I have to work outside the house but I should everything in the house.  So I am sitting here complaining to you all instead of listening to their annoying conversation.  So let’s move on dear readers and we can BOTH ignore them OK?  I am still not in top ship shape right now  so it is another day of watching TV.  I found myself sucked into the Lifetime Movie Network movie earlier this afternoon.  It was a movie about this lady who becomes a nanny for this family where the mom has two REAL kids and one imaginary child.  The husband and oldest daughter “help” this mental defect by pretending that the imaginary child is real.  It was a train wreck people I could not change the channel.  The worst part my dear readers is when I CRIED when the “imaginary” child dies.  Yes I cried when the invisible child died.  My children looked at me when I start crying and said “Yeah ummmm mom the child wasn’t real”.  I cried even harder.  It was one of those things when in a weird twisted way what if YOU really thought you had a child and you really didn’t wouldn’t that suck when reality struck you.  Ok on that note I will stop for today because I wouldn’t want you guys to think I am insane.  Hell you that know me KNOW I am insane and wouldn’t be shocked.  So I ask that the “children angels” real or not smile down on you today.

Well hello to you my dear readers.  I hope your Saturday is going well.  My daily duty at work is done for the day and here I am to bug you today.  I am still feeling bad but nowhere near as bad as yesterday.  However I am to sick to take our 12 year old and her friend to Rue 21 go shop for her friend some clothes.  So my husband is being punished and forced to take them.  This is so funny to me.  He hates shopping when I have to shop much less two teenage girls.  However he is getting off light compared to the two kids let behind with me.  My baby girl started screaming at her brother.  He was playing with her with her new Christmas toys.  So he did something that she didn’t like and she lost her little loving mind.  So she is now in “bed” till she wakes up with a better attitude.  Then my son was cranky so he has to stay out of her way.  I am lying in bed with my yucky bucket.  I am trapped my dear readers.  I am too sick to do a lot but not sick enough to suffer through bad channel lineup.  There are three hundred channels and NOTHING on.  I am now watching Forensic Files.  This is such a morbid thing but it is interesting how it works.  I swear there are some sick people out there.  The things they do to other human beings are unreal.  Well it has been ten minutes without a scream or a “MOOOOOOMMMMM” coming from their end of the house.  I guess I will need to go in there and make sure they haven’t killed each other.  They are so silly.  They love each other but argue over the stupidest things.  My oldest is supposed to go to a friend’s house tonight.  Her best friend from school is moving away so this is the one last night they can spend together.  That means the little ones are stuck with each other for the night. So they better start getting along.  Also dear readers it is a good thing I don’t have a lot of money.  These “As seen on TV” gadgets they advertise are too tempting.  I want to buy them all but of course the “As seen on TV” that is supposedly only on TV are found a Wal-Mart as my husband pointed out.  So I feel that is false advertising and they should give us a free thing.  OK well my husband is back and he had been patient enough with the girls but did not want to fight the stores crowd and only two cashiers.  If you add that it is Saturday after Christmas.  All the teenagers who got money for Christmas was itching to spend it.  So I will let you go for today.  I sure hope the “teenage” angels are smiling down on these teenager stores.

Good afternoon my dear readers.  I hope your Friday is going better than mine.  First off I have thought it was Sunday all day.  Then I woke up sick.  Not just sick but SICK.  I was supposed to be off work today but I got called in.  I woke up and started throwing up and it just went downhill from there.  By the time I got home I was a goner.  I barely made it into the house and collapse in the bed.  I haven’t moved since except for when I have to well you know what I mean.  I have been watching the “Dumbest People” shows.  I have this sick twisted desire to watch dumb people in action.  I wonder who let these people out without a keeper.  What is even sadder that this is such a problem that there are 1000 shows about this stuff.  Well now my husband who is disabled as over done his self the last few days.  So he is lying down with me to put his feet up to help with the swelling.  He is now snoring so loud I can’t even watch my dumb people in action.  I have these fantasies of sewing his nose shut or his mouth or whatever will make him stop snoring.  It is a good thing I love him or I would smother him with a pillow.  I am not stable when I feel good but you add being sick and I am a lunatic.  My dear readers I am still feeling sick.  I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.  I hope with the New Year my luck in the medical will improve.  So now I am planning for New Year’s Eve.  We always have a party at a friend’s house and I am hoping to get plenty drunk.  Now I am not a drinker really.  However I think I deserve to drink this year.  Last year I had to work the next day.  So by the time I went in I was still feeling “good”.  My profession is not one you can be drunk and do.  My problem is when I drink my language seems to get worse and worse.  My “censor” button stops working and things just fall right out of my mouth before I even know what I sad.  Most of the time I only know what I say when others tell me what I said.  I am supposed to be off the next day and I am not answering my machine.  Well dear readers you are getting off light today because I am getting yucky again.  May the “feel better” angels smile down on me.

Merry Christmas to my dearest readers and I hope you have been blessed as I have been.  I am barely hanging in there my friends.  With all extra hours at work and cooking and baking and crap like that I am exhausted.  My children were up BEFORE the butt crack of dawn.  (By the way is this a southern saying or have you “others” heard this phrase?)  Santa was good to my kids this year.  My oldest got a computer (don’t ask Santa had to sell her soul for this my dear readers and Santa will be paying for this for a few months) Then My son got Rock Band.  (Santa did some pre-holiday shopping) and then my baby got her art set she had been wanting.  (Santa got off easy with this one)  Then they were blessed with my cheapskate shopping and the work of Angels who with their good hearts provided for my children and for that I will be forever thankful.  I was excited for the Rock Band gift.  I thought how “cool” I would be playing the drums, guitar, and singing.  Cool was NOT what I felt like after playing this game.  I felt like not only did I get of the “short” bus I felt like I fell off it and got run over by its “special” tire.  It is still fun as long as the only people who watch me make a fool of myself are the ones I can “threaten” to ground or withhold “favors” if you know what I mean.  We got some other games that might be fun but I am too tired to even cut the tape on them.  So as this Christmas is coming to a close I can tell you that even with the shortness of money, the being sick as a dog, and perverts calling me at work we managed to have a wonderful Christmas and most importantly we made memories (even if I have to threaten my kids to forget the Rock Band memories) I hope you and your family have the most blessed Christmas ever.  I hope you had the privilege of seeing a smiling child opening their first present of Christmas morning.  I hope you had the chance to hear laughter following from around a kitchen table and ate so much sugar you are shaking like a pissed off Chihuahua.  Most importantly I hope you are able to sleep in tomorrow and threaten bodily harm to those who might wake you up before you are ready.  May God be with you and to quote a famous character “May you know the true spirit of Christmas and keep it in your heart all year long”.  We wish you a Merry Christmas; we wish you a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year…… Oh I am sure you wanted to know about our “deer” tradition.  Yes my dear friends we had a close call with Bambi’s mom but she had just crossed the road and was in the ditch and she had the NERVE to give us a “Bite Me” look…….

 Well Merry Christmas Eve to my dearest readers.  I cannot believe how fast this year as come and gone.  So my children are on the edge of reason.  If these children have asked me once “When are we leaving?” they have asked me a million times.  We are heading to my dad’s house tonight.  Then we will come home and they get to open one Christmas Eve present.  I usually buy them pajamas so that on Christmas morning they will look nice.  Unlike the rest of the year when they are a mixed matched.  If I was more
“Martha” I would make them matching pajamas.  I could just see my “emo” daughter wearing matching pajamas with her family.  So I know my limits when it comes to that.  My youngest daughter has told me that she plans to plow through our bedroom door in the morning.  This really isn’t an unusual occurrence around here.  They do it every other day of the year why would Christmas be different.  I keep telling them they will plow through at a wrong time (If you know what I mean) and I wasn’t paying for their therapist bill.  They are all old enough to know how “it” works.  So they are so excited that it makes me excited.  My daughter asked me what I wanted for Christmas.  I looked at her with all the love in my eyes and said “I want to see you smile on Christmas morning and that would be the best present ever”.  She thought about it for a few minutes and she said “What kind of gift is that?”  I replied “the best kind”.  She just looked at like I had lost my mind and said ok.  I think she thinks I have a drug problem or she just looked at me like I had one.  So they are getting jitterier the closer it is time to go.  It is almost funny to watch and makes my “evil” side peek out and snicker that I keep moving the “time to leave” back further and further.  We will however be need to leave soon.  I want to get to Justin’s cemetery before it gets dark so I can take a picture for my mom.  I wish I had a joke or a funny comment to enter here but the truth is I miss my brother so much.  It feels like my heart isn’t whole anymore.  I know he is spending Christmas in Heaven while we are about to try a Mission Impossible last minute trip to Wal-Mart for FREAKING chips.  I do feel him in my heart but it isn’t the same as holding him in a hug.  I have so many regrets when it comes to my brother.  I didn’t hug him enough, didn’t tell him I loved him enough, took our family time for granted, and worried about stupid stuff at the holidays instead of spending time with our loved ones but the worst thing is I didn’t make enough memories with him.  Now know what is the most important thing it isn’t gifts, food, or money it is making memories that you will never forget even after your loved one is gone.  So please have a safe and wonderful Christmas.  I pray the “Christmas” angels smile down on all of us.  Please remember my dear readers make memories this Christmas. 

I wish you a Merry Christmas Eve Eve.  My darling children have named this day Christmas Eve Eve.  I have severed my sentence at work for the day.  I came home and made pies for Christmas.  Now my children and I are watching Christmas movies again.  I am fighting a sore throat.  I swear if I get sick again so soon I am going to be really pissed.  I am hoping that it is just stress.  I hope my children will have a nice Christmas.  It won’t be much but I think they will be happy.  I am down in my moods.  When I think about my brother Justin I want to cry.  This is the second Christmas without him.  I think it is worse this year.  I am aware that I sound insane but I think the “reality” (if that is what you can call it) has set in and my heart and soul knows he isn’t coming back.  However I could never ask him to come back after he has been is the Promised Land and had Christmas in Heaven.  That would be selfish of me but I still miss him all the same.  I however know he is here with us.  Too many miracles have happened to our family for him not to be here.  I need to stop talking about this so let’s move on.  The things I do for my children.  My oldest “boyfriend” is still keeping her hanging.  I have decided that I will HAVE to have medication that will make my mind numb during the kids “dating” lives.  I have the overwhelming desire to slap this poor boy.  I KNOW I am an adult but I am very protective of my children and I just can’t stand to see them hurt.  So I am trying to stay out of it and support her when she needs support but it is hard for me to do so.  The other two children and doing fine I suppose.  They are on the edge of insanity waiting for Christmas to get here.  I bet they will go to bed at 5:00 tonight just so they can wake up for Christmas Eve.  I have to work in the morning and then come home and finish cooking and then we will go to my dad’s tomorrow night.  I have bought my brother something to put on his grave so I will stop there first.  I am praying we don’t nearly get killed by a deer AGAIN.  For the last few years we have nearly hit a deer either going or coming from my dad’s house.  I don’t know if we have a deer magnet or what but they just seem to love to jump out of the middle of NO FREAKING WHERE.  Last year this
“thing” came running at the car and did the Bambi on Ice move underneath this wooden fence and right out in front of our car.  At first I thought it was a dog but we realized it was a deer as it got the “deer in the headlight” look.  Just for the record but THAT is really how they look I can vouch.  My biggest concern about hitting the dear isn’t really the damage it does to the car but the damage it will do to my children’s mental health.  I would never be able to afford the therapy bills it would take to have my children get over us hitting a “reindeer” on CHRISTMAS EVE.  Just think about it.  Well “deer” readers (ok that was just a pun) I will let you go so you can make your little goodies.  Tomorrow I hope the Christmas Eve angels smile down on you and the “deer” angels smile down on the deer coming into our path tomorrow night……

Hello my dear readers and Happy Monday to you all.  Well three days to go my dear friends.  I hope you are ready to rock and roll.  I am doing much better because my babies are home and I have missed them so much.  I am weird about my kids.  I hate it when I am not with them.  I can’t function correctly when they are not home.  So they came home today and we did our cookie dough and made some cookies.  It was a nice big mess but it is all cleaned up and done for the day.  Tomorrow we move on to pies and cheese balls.  Then we finish Christmas Eve morning.  Well I am proud to say I survived this weekend.  The many hours and perverts and I survived it all.  I have a new rant that at first wasn’t bothering me but the more I think about it the madder I get.  My mother called and asked me if we could make a stop at a relative’s house on Christmas Eve.  At first my thoughts were “Crap another stop to make”.  My mom brought up the “She is getting older and she might be around a lot longer crap”.  So I agree to go by for a few minutes to make my mom happy.  Well a little while later my mom calls back and says “You don’t have to go to so and so’s house.”  I could tell she was crying and upset.  I asked her what was wrong and she just kept saying nothing and just to forget about Christmas Eve.  Now I know this relative and it didn’t take me but a minute to realize the problem.  One of her daughter’s is pregnant and she didn’t, want ME to come around them since I was sick.  Never mind the fact that I am no longer “sick” I have a hole in my back but other than that I am fine.  At first I thought it was funny but the more I think about it the more it is pissing me off.  I have never “fit” into this side of my family.  They are all more educated and better off than I am.  This doesn’t bother me really because it doesn’t matter how smart you are.  All that counts is your soul and your intentions.  However to be so “educated” they sure are stupid.  If they were smart they would realize that I am not contagious but most of all they would realize we are family whether they like it or not.  When my brother died I vowed that family would come first.  So on that note all I can say is “Kiss my A$$ and Merry Christmas”.  I just wish being “sick” could get out me out of other crap I don’t want to do.  You know grocery shopping, bill paying, and work.  I am not that lucky.   So in the interest of the season all I can say is “Merry Christmas and God be with your family”.  Off that subject onto the movie I am watching.  We are snuggled up and watching A Christmas Story.  I love this freaking movie.  It is so close to reality of my family I love it.  So I am going to let you go and prepare your last minute Christmas duties and enjoy my children being home and a movie.  All I can say is I pray that “Christmas” angels smile down on everyone, even the uptight, “educated” people we call family.