raramomtoo3

Hello dear readers I am sure you have missed my insane ramblings.  My depression has taken its toll this week.  I am a horrible mother.  Instead of keeping the “fantasy” of a vacation to myself I shared it with my children just to have to let them down.  I am horrible.  I really thought the government or my lawyer would come through for me.  Those who don’t know I am trying for my disability.  I have medical and mental health issues.  After 15 years of working I just can’t do it anymore.  I applied last February and was turned down.  Everyone said go to a lawyer…hire a lawyer…this is bull crap. The road to hell is littered with lawyers.  I however listened to everyone and hired a lawyer.  I handed them the fate of my family and they haven’t done crap.  I expected them to harass Social Security and keep on pushing for us but they put us in a file folder and shoved us in a drawer like we weren’t anything.  After months of not hearing from them I called and all they could say was “Well it will take us 18-24 months to get a hearing”.  I have not known ANYONE who has received disability has to go to court.  That was all she said.  She even had the damned nerve to act pissy because I called.  I don’t think these lawyers or government officials think we are real live humans with human needs.  To them we are just a number in a freaking file.  That is why I wanted to take my kids on a very overdue trip with this money.  It isn’t even about that really.  It is the fact I am not able to keep working.  Between my physical health and mental health I am just a broken woman.  So I have decided that I will begin a campaign to start writing emails, letters, and make phone calls to higher government officials.  If I harass the right person then people will see me as human instead of a number.  I ask that you pray for my family.  We are Americans and we deserve better.