raramomtoo3

Well hi there my dear friends.  It is Tuesday believe it or not.  Today is the big day for me.  Of course it really feels just like any other day.  Today is also my brothers and grandfathers birthday.  That is very rare for that to happen in one family but it sure did.  I am 32 year old mommy.  In all my 32 years being a mommy was the best decision I have ever made.  I think back over the events that have taken place during my time here and go through a series of different emotions.  The joy of meeting my husband and marrying him. The days that all my children were born. The best days of my life.  Then the stress of bills that you can’t pay, the house that doesn’t stay clean and going to work every day instead of being able to stay home and be a mommy.  Then we have the worst days of my life.  The worst day is the day I lost my 19 year old brother to The Choking Game.  As I sit here today thinking about my own birthday the grief of knowing that he will not have another birthday over whelms me.  The day the hospital called and told us to come back to the hospital if we wanted to see my grandfather once more.  The hour it took to get there is a complete and soul destroying silence to just learn we were too late.  The day my grandmother finally lost the Alztmeirs fight.  There are many more but I these are the days that haunt my dreams.  The point of my rambling on is to say that everyone has these good days and these bad days.  It is how we handle them that make us who we are.  As today instead of thinking of myself as you are supposed to do I am thinking about the ones I love the most and miss the most.  With every birthday is a chance to have WONDERFUL days and BAD days it is the strength of faith that God is watching over us.  I want to wish everyone out there a Happy Day.  Till tomorrow my dear friends I hope all angels smile down on us today.  With all my love…. 

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