raramomtoo3

Two years ago we lost you Justin.  Lost isn’t really the word….we know where you are.  However our lives changed forever two years ago.  We never thought that you wouldn’t be with us.  NEVER  Still God called you home.  In my mind and soul I know it was for a good reason that only He knows but my heart keeps screaming and wanting answers that no one else can give me but you and Him.  I have good days where I can go and not cry and then there are days where you never leave my mind.  I sneak in tears when I hope no one is looking.  I try to “cowgirl up” and be tough and strong but I am not either of those things.  I am a broken hearted sister who will never have a niece to spoil or the chance to watch you walk down the asile to the love of your life.  Instead I had to let you go before you even really got to be hear.  I am rambling now and I am sorry. 
 
We will release balloons tomorrow in honor of your second angel day.
For all the others who are here to wish us well wishes trust me we feel them and appericaite them more than you will ever know.
I ask that today you tell ANYONE who will listen about The Choking Game.  Tell them the dangers and about Justin.  If we save one life today then Justin didn’t die in vain.  Below is the newest poem I have written for Justin.
 

Time keeps moving on

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Two years has passed we last looked into your eyes,

It has been two years since you became our angel who can fly.

Some days it feels that two years have passed in a blink,

Then some days it moves so much slower than your heart would think.

For two years our grief has taken over our hearts,

We try to heal but we have no idea where to start.

Two years ago we were living our everyday life,

Just thinking once and never thinking twice.

We made our plans for the next day, next week, and the next year,

Never did we think that you wouldn’t be here.

Now we live our lives minute by minute and day by day,

Now we live in fear who might be the next angel that God will take away.

Will there ever be a day we won’t think of you and cry?

Will we be able to answer other peoples questions and not lie?

Will we ever be as strong as we pretend to be?

Will we ever be as strong that others think we should be?

If tears from our eyes would have kept you here,

We would have cried a river for you my brother dear.

However keeping you here would have been selfish and wrong,

Because you are with God and that is where you belong.
 

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